TAKE A SIP:
- “For the gamers.”
- The words “exciting,” “innovative,” and “revolutionary”
are used in regards to a shooter.- Fallout 4 VR is shown
- Some guy wears a graphic t-shirt + sports jacket
on-stage.- A forgettable survival game trailer is released.
You swear you have seen this game before. Haven’t you?- DLC.
- Season Pass.
- Person on-stage makes an awkward joke and 3
people in the audience laugh.- You see a fantastic cosplay.
- Call of Duty WWII gameplay is shown + “We’re
returning to our roots.”- Someone asks Todd Howard/Pete Hines about TES VI
and they sigh and say, “It’s a long way off.- Red Dead Redemption announced to be releasing
this year.- New Assassin’s Creed revealed.
- New Wolfenstein revealed.
- Forgettable white guy protagonist with stubble
and a gravelly voice.- Remaster. Remaster. Remaster.
- Yet another multiplayer team-based shooter.
TAKE A SHOT:
- New Far Cry game is really a Western.
- Pokemon game for Switch revealed.
- New IP from Bioware makes an appearance.
- Xbox Scorpio costs less than $499 USD.
- Cyberpunk 2077 makes an appearance.
- Another awful song-and-dance number.
- Beautiful indie game captures your heart.
- Evil Within 2 revealed.
- Reboot of a game from 10 years ago that looks
like an entirely new IP.- A game leaves you thinking, “What in the fresh
fuck is that meant to be?”- New Ratchet and Clank.
- Remake? Remake!
FINISH YOUR DRINK
- Bethesda Game Studios reveals new IP. (Take an additional shot if it’s Starfield.)
- Another Fallout spinoff-title developed by
another studio is revealed.- Remedy’s new game revealed.
- Release date for first episode of Final Fantasy
VII remake announced.- Sony Conference features live orchestra AGAIN.
- Bloodborne 2.
- Square Enix talks about Final Fantasy XVI.
- A game comes out of NOWHERE and destroys you. It’s
everything you’ve ever wanted. Fuck, pour yourself another drink!
But like I would LOVE Far Cry: Wild West. (Since Red Dead 2 probably won’t be on PC.)
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